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Economics’ Definitions according to Indian Paradigms (spoof)

Economics’ Definitions according to Indian Paradigms (spoof)

By Anubha Gautam

Edited by Michelle Cherian, Associate Editor, The Indian Economist

The break dance of Indian economics with response to the cacophony of inflation and recession has been stiff and unsteady. When we feel cozy and relaxed in the blanket of hope that India will be a superpower, the dates of achievement are pushed further. Here politics overshadows economics and nepotism is prioritized over economic growth.  Here is a desi version of some popular economics definition aligned to the situation of our country.

Economics- The definition of Economics will be broken down into following four sub categories for easier relativity of a frustrated Indian with the status quo- Poverty definition, Relative welfare definition, Scarcity definition, and Downfall-centered definition

Poverty definition– Economics is a creation of policies which will lead to pitfalls further ensuring the creation of poverty and the ways and means to sustain poverty. The central point is poverty creation. Poverty is identified with a politician’s welfare (e.g. Bihar); the poorer India is, the happier the politicians so that they can come up with pseudo growth policies and employment yojnas to fill the pockets of ministers and bureaucrats. The important point is to make the politicians richer (install 47 ACs in their houses) and make the poor poorer.

Relative welfare definition- It is the game of hiring minister’s relatives in every business of life and ensuring their smooth progress subsequently. There should be no enquiries on how he (Read Robert Vadra) earns his income and buys plots or invests money until the opposition comes into power.

Scarcity definitions- It is the art of ensuring that laws ensuring the eradications of loopholes in the economy (read APMC acts) are always in promulgation and never approved on time. It advocates the thinking that price hike and restraining checks on black market are more important than regulation of black markets. The application of this economics has ensured starving of people and protruding bellies of many at the same time, bizarre right?

Downfall-centered definition- This sort of economics in our country ensures erratic resource allocation and subsequent successful slumps in growth rates and GDP. The alternative uses and sources of resources are left unidentified and the focus is made on depleting the existing resources.

These are a few other definitions of Economic terms, designed to suit the situation of the Aam Aadmi:

Unemployment- Found in abundance and is omnipresent. Highly supported by system framework and education universities (read private engineering college), a problem which rarely bothers politicians and when it does, it helps the employed, ironic? Tell us about it!

Inflation-Our friend we do not believe in upsetting by fighting with it.

Three main problems –

Unlimited greed of many and right intentions of few

Limited workforce to achieve development and welfare

More of rhetoric and pompous promises and much less of work

Three main questions

How to save things which have been produced and allocate them properly and also save them from vultures?

How to pay correctly for the produce?

Who will solve the above two problems?

Anubha  is a 2nd year student of English Honors in Maitreyi College; DU. She is an enthusiastic writer, debater and feminist. Following the trends of market, economy society observing and analyzing them are one of her favorite occupations. She has been associated with writing and other ancillary fields since her childhood, obsessed with English and writing, she aims to become a successful writer in near future. In her free time she loves to play Sudoku and learn new things.


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